A Good Day to Die Hard

A Good Day to Die Hard (John Moore, 2013)

The first instalment of this franchise, Die Hard, starring Bruce Willis as New York policeman John McClane visiting his family for Christmas and getting struck in the Takami building in an hostage takeover by terrorists was original, fresh, a brilliant homage to John Carpenter’s Assault on Precinct 13, and a new twist on the Action genre. As the writer of those lines, I loved the first three movies of the Die Hard series, and even if this blog is more about classics, art house, and high brow cinema I can actually enjoy a good movie and appreciate many aspects even if it only involves explosions and gun fires. The action genre is not the kind of movies that bores most of people. Well, some people who elevates themselves over pedestrians and think they are better than the majority might contempt this kind of entertainment. It is their problem. For me if it’s entertaining in some way I’ll be entertained and I think that it success its main goal when we speak about movies. But I would have had a different speech if we were talking about films although.

The Room

This review is my entry for the Review Tournament held at the LAMB called So You Think You Can Review. Since the identities of the losing participants have been revealed I've decided to re-edit this review and put it here.

The Room (Tommy Wiseau, 2003)

A happy-go-lucky banker sees his world fall apart when his friends begin to betray him one-by-one.

Presented as one of the worst movies of all time, Tommy Wiseau’s The Room was a real head scratcher to me. My interest was mitigated between a curious interest and a little discouragement. Just the poorly made poster with the use of a cheap font and the not-so-appealing face of Wiseau’s character Johnny doesn’t naturally bring you towards this movie. Plus the cheap looking cinematography that looks like a mix of soap and porn isn’t the thing that got me to rush towards the television and ask for more.

Moreover, this kind of actor/director à la Orson Welles or Clint Eastwood might be a sign of pure genius. But in this case it just looks as bad as Ed Wood Jr.’s films. Wiseau who self produced and financed his first film wanted to make his debut outside of the Hollywood system to make it just like he wants. This is, indeed, a very unique film. It might also be the worst film to ever be presented to the Academy. In an interview Wiseau declared that he filled the forms to get to be nominated for the precious statuettes. Well, you know your History and writing that he didn’t get nominated isn’t a real big spoiler here.

Why in the world would someone choose this film for a reviewing competition one would ask? Well, it’s for the film’s cult status just like The Rocky Horror Picture Show, people would dress like their favorite character and go to midnight representations of The Room. The movie actually toured in 2010 around the world and Wiseau would be attending some of these and talk before the actual showing.

At first I thought it was some kind of a joke on me when I begin to watch the “thing”. But when I thought that some people actually attend midnight screenings of this mess I now think that the joke is on them. Why? The plot is very stereotyped and the characters are so one sided that it is like watching a bad play filmed. The sets are so tiny that when the guys are throwing the football it is ridiculous how they throw the ball. And just like one of the films Wiseau loves, Citizen Kane a film so far away from The Room, he directs and acts in the film to do like Orson Welles did. However, Welles had a great talent at both, Wiseau is the complete opposite. He is the cheapest looking director and probably the worst ever actor I ever saw on film. His lines “Aha” reminded me of Beavis and Butthead and his mumbling of words and lines that looks like they were borrowed from well wishes cards weren’t my cup of tea if you let me borrow an expression myself.

The interactions between the characters are almost incestuous and Lisa (Juliette Danielle), Johnny’s fiancée is like pure evil while Johnny is the holier than thou. In real life no one acts like this and nobody is as black or as white. But the best thing I kept for the end are the sex scenes, because without them the story doesn’t hold together, I guess. Shot just like cheap soft core and using footage from one scene to the other. I even fast forwarded those scenes because I got bored to hear Tommy Wiseau’s sighing and worst watching his naked butt. First they are too often, too long and it is just a waste of time because the film doesn’t really needed them and it just destabilized because the movie practically opens with one and without being really graphic they kind of just put the movie on some kind of pause.

Well, The Room is the kind of cult film that may be discussed much longer about it flaws and surprising missteps. It still, nonetheless, earned some kind of recognition amongst film geeks. I suggest that you give it a try just to know what the fuss is all about. At least you now know a little much what you are about to watch. You’ve been warned. This way the joke will be on you too not just on me.

Something Borrowed

Something Borrowed (Luke Greenfield, 2011)

Adapted from a chicklit Best-seller of the same title, Something Borrowed is a light rom-com about misunderstandings within many relationships between the characters of this movie. First, you have Rachel (Ginnifer Goodwin), the best friend of Darcy (Kate Hudson) who's gonna marry Dex (Colin Egglesfield) and the guy friend Ethan (John Krasinski). Rachel is the one who presented Dex to Darcy and she should be the one. In fact, the whole thing is a misunderstanding. Rachel is generous, intelligent, cute while Darcy is self-centered, shallow and annoying. Dex is a sign showing pecs and abs while the "boy" friend Ethan is funny, intelligent and, by the way, has the most interesting part and the best one liners. Well, there's not a ton of them here but his are worth noticing.

Even if Something Borrowed isn't a complete failure there's a sense of rhythm that just didn't felt right. First the character of Dex isn't interesting at all and we cannot understand how in the first place Rachel could have felt for him and how she could manage to still have feelings for him after he started dating the opposite of her: Darcy, her best friend did I mentionned that? I don't think I even understand how these two girls were friends after all, they're so different and Rachel just doesn't seems to care for all the unfair actions Darcy does to her. Sometimes, I think that the people who makes chick flicks just think that girls/women have no tastes and know nothing about films.

Moreover, the whole film, as for its directing, editing, cinematography looks cheap and made with restricted budgets like a soap. Like if framing correctly was an option or editing a scene tighter to keep up the rhythm and or letting the action takes its place wasn't available at the time. Instead, they prefer to shoot three seconds shots with conventional, if not textbook action/reaction shots.

As you might have guessed, I wasn't a big fan of Something Borrowed but I gave a chance to the movie. Even my girlfriend who's a fan of chicklit and who devoured the novel wasn't really cheerful about the film either giving it a six out of ten, which by the way is a bad rating in my gf's book. Since I'm harsher in my ratings I gave Something Borrowed one star out of five and maybe one more for John Krasinski's presence since he is the star of the movie in my book.

The Sentinel (1977)

The Sentinel (Michael Winner, 1977)

Widely inspired from Horror hits like The Exorcist, Freaks, and Rosemary's Baby, Michael Winner's The Sentinel presents the story of a young mannequin who takes a new apartment in New York City. At night she encounters weird things from her neighborhood. Her neighbors, a weird lonely man, a couple of lesbians, a secluded priest and many other eclectic people live in her building. The inspiration of Rosemary's Baby is palpable, the new apartment, the modernism of the city is seen here. On the other side, the themes of catholicism like in The Exorcist are exploited but not in an intersting manner. The ending is precipitated and boring. The plot goes in everyway and the structure of the movie is fragile.

The lead actors are bad, especially Chris Sarandon with his "mustache". I put the "" because it doesn't really deserves the real name for it. The supporting cast has some familiar faces; Beverly D'Angelo (Christmas Vacation, Entourage, American X History), Ava Gardner, John Carradine, Jose Ferrer, and Jeff Goldblum.

Some parts of the film are laughable and some are simply pathetic, this is caused because the film is very outdated and that it doesn't really scare anyone anymore... The Sentinel doesn't have the depth of the classic horror films aforementionned because its story is only on the first level and it misses its target. Avoid this stupid waste of talented actors.

Valentine's Day un film de Garry Marshall

Valentine's Day is the new movie from the director who made the refreshing Pretty Woman in 1990, Runaway Bride and the two Princess Diaries. Well, not a talented firector but a veteran. He should be armed to make an efficient movie and entertain his public.

With his last movie, Valentine's Day he fails to make an entertaining and efficient. Since the succes of Love Actually we've seen many attempt to recreate the same multi stories based on different kinds of love, for example last year's He's Just Not That Into You was a complete failure and can be one of the worsts of 2009.

For Valentine' s Day it's pretty much the same, a cast of many big names, many stories that touch many characters. The too many stories set in Valentine's Day diluate their quality. Because there is not a single story that goes very far and the film has no deepness in it. They fell into clichés of melodrama. The characters are so sterortyped that they could have drew them with a big black marker.

So stories had potential but they all felt fake and unvanished. I think if the script had been reworked and some stories thrown out this could have make an entertaining and efficient film.

On the appreciation side, if I can had something to what has been said before, well I dislike the kind of movie where the producers thinks that people are stupid and that they will buy whatever story just because it's Valentine's Day in L.A.. Now I can't wait for the holidays to rewatch Love Actually and see an entertaining and efficient film!


A Film Review by Michaël Parent